It is no wonder there is no compassion, consideration and empathy in the world.
Ride the local public school bus then take a peek into the lives of those kids.
Even if they are good kids from Christian homes being raised by parents who care often their parents treat people the same way the kid does at school.
I witnessed it and was the main receiver of it this weekend.
Ever been invited to an event and asked not to tell anyone you are coming?
I have.
I thought it unusual at the time but the host said she did not want to be harassed by others who wanted to attend and had no room for them because of the limited amount of room.
The host actually said it is already full.
I then wondered if I was a replacement.
Ever been one of those?
Invited to make things even and because they have already expended money for a number of spots.
Nothing really wrong with it, and my dear friend has had it turn out nicely in the past and now is part of putting on her favorite event year after year.
I spent a couple of weeks looking forward to the event and as the day to leave rolled around started to dread it but put my thoughts aside and prayed for God's will in it all.
I showed up at the event 5 minutes early and was greeted with a smiling face of a friend of a friend. Found out the host was not there and there were no room assignments so I picked my favorite spot having stayed a few times at the location.
Others started to arrive and I greeted them and helped them with their bags offering spots in the room I was in. I heard a murmured words of, "If I had known she was coming I would not of."
I thought Me? and gave it up to the Lord.
I never have fit in anywhere even in my own family. My brain makes connections faster then most people and it seems to bring out the worst in others. I never played the clique games in High School and I refuse to play them at church or in society of the rural area I live in.
Then the host arrived and we all pitched in to help her.
More people arrived and we again helped them to bring their stuff in and I offered accommodations in the room I was in.
At this point I was still the only person in my room and it appeared everyone was there.
Around dinner two other ladies arrived and the other rooms being full or near full found spots in the room I was in.
While at the retreat during public conversations we were all listening to and thought to be included in a woman was explaining some problems she was having. When she finished I asked for clarification on two things she said. I thought about it a few minutes and then asked her if she in telling us about the problem was looking for suggestions or solutions to her issue.
She gave me the vilest look I have ever seen and said "I did not realize you were part of the conversation! Maybe you should mind your own business!"
I with tears burning at the edge of my eyes said "Not a problem." and left the room for a while.
My family says you can read what I am thinking on my face so I am sure she was happy with the reaction I gave.
While I was in the other room everyone else went outside.
People started to come back in to retrieve items. They must not of realized I could hear them or that I was even there. I heard them speak of me by name and how random I was and how a conversation can be discussed on a topic and I will just interject and change it. How I am flighty, rude, and pushy religious nut. How my mother did not raise me properly because leggings are not pants. I was wearing and often do wear nice pants that are called leggings. They are a nice thick legging or what some might call a riding pant.
I just sat there trying to ignore them and read. But when your named the subject of the conversation it is hard to not listen.
I so wanted to go home.
When it was meal time I would ask for something to be passed to me and two of the women would look at each other and roll their eyes. One actually saying "Don't you think you have had enough!"
It was not a question.
I had not even had firsts of the item I asked for but because I am obese I feel I have to justify the request even here.
Would you have just gone home by now?
I tried to maintain a positive attitude and actually had friends and family elsewhere praying for me.
During another conversation time when we were all talking and included. I shared some amazing wonderful things about our hostess.
She came in my room and sat on my bed and accused me of being random.
Not really sure what she means.
But I am assuming it is a veiled burn or maybe my brain just makes the connections and leaps to other topics so fast that others can not keep up and feel put upon by my randomness.
I asked if I had done something wrong.
She said know your just so random.
I was so lost at this point.
Most of craft and free time was spent across the room with the windows open because of the perfumes, and scents in products.
Some offered to include me in it but when I explained I could not others gave me the venom looks that you know stop every demon in hell and make them smile.
During a free time when dinner was going to be prepared I wondered off by myself and was laying in the front of the chapel drawing and reading.
People actually came in an looked at the chapel and had conversations not knowing I was there.Sadly I was the topic of some not so nice thoughts.
I refuse to list them here again because I could not hardly get through it to tell my family.
I then moved to another area to see what everyone was doing and could not find a soul so I went to a common area and sat till called for dinner.
Everyone was mad because I was late but yet when I showed them the time I was going buy I was early. Sorry mine is set to the atomic clock every 24 hours.
I received a snide remark. "You always have to be right or have the last word."
*sigh*
I went to bed right after dinner and put my head phones in so I would not have to hear anything. I did have a long conversation via facebook with family members at home, mom, brothers and a friend I have not chatted with in 3 years while laying there in bed.
The next morning I got ready for the day and it was pack up day so I packed all my things up so I was not in the way when it was time to clean the room before we left.
I walked out and most people were up but as always all weekend there was not room at the table for everyone and none was made for me as it was for others.
No worries. I pulled as close as I could and tried to be part of the group.
They again had long conversations about their educations, careers and professional lives.
I did not talk much about that or even listen because I have been there and done that and it is not all it seems.
But when the nurses of many different backgrounds started talking about helping on cases where people are forced to be sterilized by court order and being for it. They also talked about since the baby is probably dying or going to be a drain on society it is okay to take its life in the sterilization of its mother.
I could not take it any more.
This is a group of Christian women? At a Christian camp at a Christian Womens Retreat?
I stated in a very firm voice that broke with emotion "WOW! Welcome to Nazi Germany.
I showed them through history fact that this is exactly what happened in Hitlers Germany right after he was elected. The retarded, disabled, alcoholics, gypsy's any undesirable was forced to be sterilized.
AND HITLER WAS ELECTED!
We can not play god. When we do with the drug addict mom who keeps getting pregnant it is wrong.
Sterilization has to be a choice. If we force by court order and take away someone else's right to choose then do not blink and wonder whey the government comes along and takes away your right to choose what is best for you.
I AM NOT SAYING abortion is right or should be legal. I am against abortion.
I honestly wonder if there is something wrong with me or if my walk with the Lord has just progressed father then I thought.
I mean I actually questioned could I of misread the bible. I think not now but wow!
I am not sure I will ever recover from this retreat.
I know I have fewer friends or people that will talk to me on the street now too.
I stand for what is biblically and constitutionally right.
I CHALLENGE YOU to call me out any time you see me NOT doing just that.
YIKES High School all over again.
Ride the local public school bus then take a peek into the lives of those kids.
Even if they are good kids from Christian homes being raised by parents who care often their parents treat people the same way the kid does at school.
I witnessed it and was the main receiver of it this weekend.
Ever been invited to an event and asked not to tell anyone you are coming?
I have.
I thought it unusual at the time but the host said she did not want to be harassed by others who wanted to attend and had no room for them because of the limited amount of room.
The host actually said it is already full.
I then wondered if I was a replacement.
Ever been one of those?
Invited to make things even and because they have already expended money for a number of spots.
Nothing really wrong with it, and my dear friend has had it turn out nicely in the past and now is part of putting on her favorite event year after year.
I spent a couple of weeks looking forward to the event and as the day to leave rolled around started to dread it but put my thoughts aside and prayed for God's will in it all.
I showed up at the event 5 minutes early and was greeted with a smiling face of a friend of a friend. Found out the host was not there and there were no room assignments so I picked my favorite spot having stayed a few times at the location.
Others started to arrive and I greeted them and helped them with their bags offering spots in the room I was in. I heard a murmured words of, "If I had known she was coming I would not of."
I thought Me? and gave it up to the Lord.
I never have fit in anywhere even in my own family. My brain makes connections faster then most people and it seems to bring out the worst in others. I never played the clique games in High School and I refuse to play them at church or in society of the rural area I live in.
Then the host arrived and we all pitched in to help her.
More people arrived and we again helped them to bring their stuff in and I offered accommodations in the room I was in.
At this point I was still the only person in my room and it appeared everyone was there.
Around dinner two other ladies arrived and the other rooms being full or near full found spots in the room I was in.
While at the retreat during public conversations we were all listening to and thought to be included in a woman was explaining some problems she was having. When she finished I asked for clarification on two things she said. I thought about it a few minutes and then asked her if she in telling us about the problem was looking for suggestions or solutions to her issue.
She gave me the vilest look I have ever seen and said "I did not realize you were part of the conversation! Maybe you should mind your own business!"
I with tears burning at the edge of my eyes said "Not a problem." and left the room for a while.
My family says you can read what I am thinking on my face so I am sure she was happy with the reaction I gave.
While I was in the other room everyone else went outside.
People started to come back in to retrieve items. They must not of realized I could hear them or that I was even there. I heard them speak of me by name and how random I was and how a conversation can be discussed on a topic and I will just interject and change it. How I am flighty, rude, and pushy religious nut. How my mother did not raise me properly because leggings are not pants. I was wearing and often do wear nice pants that are called leggings. They are a nice thick legging or what some might call a riding pant.
I just sat there trying to ignore them and read. But when your named the subject of the conversation it is hard to not listen.
I so wanted to go home.
When it was meal time I would ask for something to be passed to me and two of the women would look at each other and roll their eyes. One actually saying "Don't you think you have had enough!"
It was not a question.
I had not even had firsts of the item I asked for but because I am obese I feel I have to justify the request even here.
Would you have just gone home by now?
I tried to maintain a positive attitude and actually had friends and family elsewhere praying for me.
During another conversation time when we were all talking and included. I shared some amazing wonderful things about our hostess.
She came in my room and sat on my bed and accused me of being random.
Not really sure what she means.
But I am assuming it is a veiled burn or maybe my brain just makes the connections and leaps to other topics so fast that others can not keep up and feel put upon by my randomness.
I asked if I had done something wrong.
She said know your just so random.
I was so lost at this point.
Most of craft and free time was spent across the room with the windows open because of the perfumes, and scents in products.
Some offered to include me in it but when I explained I could not others gave me the venom looks that you know stop every demon in hell and make them smile.
During a free time when dinner was going to be prepared I wondered off by myself and was laying in the front of the chapel drawing and reading.
People actually came in an looked at the chapel and had conversations not knowing I was there.Sadly I was the topic of some not so nice thoughts.
I refuse to list them here again because I could not hardly get through it to tell my family.
I then moved to another area to see what everyone was doing and could not find a soul so I went to a common area and sat till called for dinner.
Everyone was mad because I was late but yet when I showed them the time I was going buy I was early. Sorry mine is set to the atomic clock every 24 hours.
I received a snide remark. "You always have to be right or have the last word."
*sigh*
I went to bed right after dinner and put my head phones in so I would not have to hear anything. I did have a long conversation via facebook with family members at home, mom, brothers and a friend I have not chatted with in 3 years while laying there in bed.
The next morning I got ready for the day and it was pack up day so I packed all my things up so I was not in the way when it was time to clean the room before we left.
I walked out and most people were up but as always all weekend there was not room at the table for everyone and none was made for me as it was for others.
No worries. I pulled as close as I could and tried to be part of the group.
They again had long conversations about their educations, careers and professional lives.
I did not talk much about that or even listen because I have been there and done that and it is not all it seems.
But when the nurses of many different backgrounds started talking about helping on cases where people are forced to be sterilized by court order and being for it. They also talked about since the baby is probably dying or going to be a drain on society it is okay to take its life in the sterilization of its mother.
I could not take it any more.
This is a group of Christian women? At a Christian camp at a Christian Womens Retreat?
I stated in a very firm voice that broke with emotion "WOW! Welcome to Nazi Germany.
I showed them through history fact that this is exactly what happened in Hitlers Germany right after he was elected. The retarded, disabled, alcoholics, gypsy's any undesirable was forced to be sterilized.
AND HITLER WAS ELECTED!
We can not play god. When we do with the drug addict mom who keeps getting pregnant it is wrong.
Sterilization has to be a choice. If we force by court order and take away someone else's right to choose then do not blink and wonder whey the government comes along and takes away your right to choose what is best for you.
I AM NOT SAYING abortion is right or should be legal. I am against abortion.
I honestly wonder if there is something wrong with me or if my walk with the Lord has just progressed father then I thought.
I mean I actually questioned could I of misread the bible. I think not now but wow!
I am not sure I will ever recover from this retreat.
I know I have fewer friends or people that will talk to me on the street now too.
I stand for what is biblically and constitutionally right.
I CHALLENGE YOU to call me out any time you see me NOT doing just that.
YIKES High School all over again.
